Abi had arrived home late in the night and was glad that her grandparents were already asleep. Her father was the one who let her inside.
Andrew saw her puffy, red eyes but all he asked was if she was alright. Abi told him she was fine, that she was just a little upset and her dad didn't ask anymore. He looked like he understood her and he just led her to her room, telling her to have a rest.
Abi tried to sleep and she did after a few hours of sobbing quietly, but she woke up at 3 am and started crying again. She couldn't go back to sleep again because her mind was too chaotic, with so many thoughts running around like headless chickens, so she stood up and opened the window. The moon was no longer there. No stars even. The sky was dark, as hollow and lifeless as her insides.
She sank slowly to the floor and hugged her knees with her head down. What had she done? When will this pain stop? Will she be able to see him again? Will he hate her for what she did? She knew that she had to do what needed to be done but she still had many doubts. Maybe she shouldn't have started this. If only she knew it would end up like this!
She didn't know how long she stayed there, sitting in that pitiful fetal position.
The cold wind was blowing, but she couldn't care less.
But then, she began to feel something different in the air. She felt a familiar chill and it wasn't because of the cold wind. Abi's dying heart began to palpitate. She didn't lift her face to look because she was afraid that it was all in her imagination.
However, as she remained there, paralyzed, that deep seraphic voice echoed in her ears.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice deep and calm and Abi finally looked up.
Her mouth hung open when she saw that Alex was there, just outside the window. He was standing on a small balcony connecting through to her father's room on the other side of the house. He was there and he seemed so real as he looked at her.
Abi slowly stood up, her face filled with disbelief.
"A-alex?" she called out, obviously questioning if what she was seeing was real or not.
"Did a nightmare wake you up again?" he asked again. It was dark and she could hardly see his expressions but she could hear the unusual tenseness in his voice.
Abi slowly shook her head. "I… didn't have a nightmare tonight," she told him honestly, still looking at him with disbelief. She then ran towards her door and switched the lights on.
When she looked at the window again, Alex was climbing inside through the window and Abi froze in place. It really was him, her Alex. But why?
"What… why are you here?" she asked, her voice weak.
Alex stared at her and then he turned away with a far-off gaze in his eyes that vanished almost as quickly as it came.
"I don't know," was all he replied, his voice had become a soft murmur. For the first time, Alex looked meek and helpless. She had never seen him look that way before and it was taking all of her self control not to reach out and touch him, and embrace him tightly.
Abi didn't know what to say. She looked back at him with a million questions in her eyes but she was afraid to speak again because she was afraid that the tears that were threatening to spill over would gush out and she would lose control of herself.
He looked like he was waiting for her to speak, and when she didn't, he began to step closer to her. Abi felt her heart ramming against her chest, and her heartbeats drumming in her ears.
He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds before he opened his lips again. "I'm not sure how I ended up here but…" He hesitated, looking for the right word. "I think I came here for three reasons."
He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds before he continued. "First reason… I think I've gone crazy from the moment you left."
Abi gaped at him. His voice as he said those words stabbed at her heart. Her throat clenched in pain and clouds of fear began to form inside her.
"Second… I came to ask something. How did you know that you've fallen in love with me?" He blinked, studying her intently as if he was searching for the truth in her eyes.
But Abi couldn't speak. Her head was spinning at the rapid change in direction of the things he was saying. Why? Why was he suddenly asking her all of these?
When Abi's pale lips didn't open to speak, Alex continued talking after a moment passed by, as he seemingly assembled his thoughts.
"Was it because you realized all you ever wanted was to be with me? Was it because you just couldn't get me out of your head no matter what you do? Was it because you realized that you no longer want anything or anyone else but me?"
He watched her face closely, keenly looking for the silent answers from her expression as she digested everything he just said. And the answer she gave him was her tears falling from her eyes. Her lips trembled and the silent tears fell one after another. That reaction was enough for Alex. This little lamb was easy to read sometimes after all.
Alex's eyes scorched beneath his gorgeous lashes. He gently wiped away her falling tears with his thumb. He smiled like he was in utter disbelief about what he was doing and then his next words tumbled out.
"I think I am feeling the same thing you are and this damn thing is driving me insane right now… I think this is what you call, being in love."
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